How to Win CoWorkers and Alienate Fewer People

Sometimes it’s hard to work with people.  Not everyone is going to like you.  You can’t please everyone.  These are truths I know as an adult, but I’m finding that I have a hard time putting them into practice.

We all have at least one person we work with who is not our favorite coworker. Sometimes this person is a bully or just a flat out jerk.  Usually it’s much easier to deal with if the person in overly obnoxious or causes problems for multiple people. Sometimes the person is surrounded by people who are willing to let it slide.  Often times they will say, “Hey, it’s just the way Joe is” or “It’s Joe being Joe.”  Whatever the case, you have to learn to deal with difficult people.  This is a lesson I am learning right now.

I’m a pleaser, a peacekeeper, a compromiser, but I am not a fighter. That’s part of the problem.  I’m not good at sticking up for myself.  This is the year I intend to learn.

Advertisements

11 thoughts on “How to Win CoWorkers and Alienate Fewer People

  1. It’s interesting to learn where one needs to set new boundaries. First to honor yourself, then to honor the other person and most importantly to simply be more loving. Sometimes that means to be ‘nicer’ and other times it’s just best to walk away. I think this is a life lesson. Once you improve in one area there will be another chance to be more loving/understanding/honoring.

    Like

  2. I am in the too nice for my own good camp, I feel your pain. What I’ve discovered is that 98% of the jerks back off when you assert yourself! My mum has told me this all my life, but it’s one of those things you have to learn on your own time! Gumption is liberating! Best of luck on your journey.
    Summer

    Like

  3. Same here. But in the end, I would rather be me living out my own values than go through life like the bullies and the jerks. The trick — which I haven’t mastered — is to learn how to counter them without becoming them.

    Like

    • That’s true, and that’s what I’m working on. I’m so mad at myself for standing there and letting this person insult who I am, but I couldn’t find a graceful way out. I wanted to scream or cry or both because that was what was going on in my head, but I just stood there because I didn’t want to be like him. I couldn’t see an alternative, so I stood there and listened.

      Like

  4. Totally agree .. frustrating co-workers can influence everyone’s productivity and creativity. At times I find it easier to ignore them until a limit is reached. Then it becomes necessary to speak up. Hope all works out!!

    Like

  5. Reblogged this on What motherhood has taught me…. and commented:
    I often find it very difficult to stick up for myself as I am very uncomfortable with confrontations of any sort. Maybe it is because person I’m standing up to is often of a different mindset than I am, and I’m worried that by sticking up for myself I will in some way offend them, weird I know. However, we must learn to stick up for ourselves and voice our position so as to highlight those issues from where the conflict exists; otherwise there may not be a satisfactory resolution.

    Like

  6. I often find it very difficult to stick up for myself as I am very uncomfortable with confrontations of any sort. Maybe it is because person I’m standing up to is often of a different mindset than I am, and I’m worried that by sticking up for myself I will in some way offend them, weird I know. However, we must learn to stick up for ourselves and voice our position so as to maintain our own integrity and highlight those issues from where the conflict exists; otherwise there may not be a satisfactory resolution.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s